Should I Choose Love, Or Becoming A Mother?

Dear Martha,

I’m so scared. I love my partner but my partner confessed that he has a disease that is degenerative and eventually can not bear children. I love him very much and I do not want to leave him, but my dream has always been to have a family. I’d like to hear your advice.

— Hopeful Future Mother

Dear Hopeful Future Mother,

You didn’t tell me what the disease was, and whether it would only leave him sterile. If he will continue to be healthy and capable of caring for a family, you can contemplate other options, such as: adoption, artificial insemination, and other alternatives available in this country.

If you think that he’s the love of your life, and that you’re going to be able to tackle this with maturity and love, you have no reason to separate. You haven’t really told me other information, such as your age, how long you have been together, how bad this disease could get, etc.

The first thing I suggest is that you seek professional help, so that the decision you make is well informed and you don’t have regrets or blame each other. That’s why there’s the saying, “El amore todo lo puede,” or “All you need is love.”