By Mexican Mitt Romney, Pocho Ñews Service
This is a terrible day for illness and disease. Obamacare being upheld by those activist judges at the Supremes Court is making me sicker than the time I tried McDonald’s experimental “Birria Burger.”
Thank God it was Available for a Limited Time Only.
The Republican Party is the only party looking out for disease! Diseases are people, my friends. Especially Jan Brewer.
This ruling upholding Obamacare is wrong for Amercia, and really messes up my campaign for President. However, things are not terminal yet.
I vow on my Day Juan in office as Presidente Romney, to repeal Obamacare (AKA Romneycare) and replace it with Romneydoesntcare.
Romneydoesntcare is modeled on the health system we had before, which was, “rich people pay cash for healthcare, and everyone else can go pound pupusas.”
El GOP is the party of innovation. Back at my chain of neighborhood clinics located in strip malls all over the barrio, I developed a new, more efficient system to replace Obamacare. I was waiting to present my new healthcare plan for Latinos, Labambacare, but here it is now.
Under under Labambacare, patients are entitled to a choice of a wide range of culturally-sensitive medical treatments and cures, including:
- FREE 7-Up
- VICKS VAPO RUB
- SANTERIA CURES involving CHICKEN BONES and FEATHERS and such
- Counseling about the DANGERS of Aqua Net hairspray
- MEDICAL MENUDO (I got this idea from my amigo Ron Pablo)
Sobadores are free. But they have the right to refuse service to JOHN TRAVOLTA.
If I missed anything, you are welcome to please comment below with additional LATINO -RELEVANT TREATMENTS.
Thank you, and I hope everyone’s pre-existing conditions act up.
This article was first published in Pocho.com
POCHO ÑEWS SERVICE PNS IS A WHOLLY-FICTITIOUS SUBSIDIARY OF POCHISMO, INC., A CALIFORNIA CORPORATION, WHO IS A PERSON ACCORDING TO THE SUPREME COURT. DON’T ASK US, WE JUST WORK HERE.[Photo by Mexican Mitt Romney]