How Do We Define Machismo?

Machismo, in my life, reminds me of songs like José Alfredo Jiménez’s “Mi Palabra es la Ley.” That paves the way to manliness. Boys will be boys, you know.

So who is this macho man? What does he look like? Is the macho man the person who drives his F-150 Supercharged? The muscle head at the gym who spends more time admiring himself in the mirror than actually taking time to work out? What about a man who’s the boss in a relationship? The reality is that it can be all of the above and then some. The view of the macho man varies from person-to-person and culture.

Despite the different variations and mental pictures that machismo conjures in the mind, one thing is clear: it is the source of much controversy. On one hand, many believe that being macho is the true source and meaning of what it means to be a man. Some think of it as a rite of passage or entitlement. Yet, many believe machismo results in many broken relationships, selfishness and much unhappiness despite its portrayal in pop culture.

I learned early on that boys shouldn’t cry or be sensitive. We need to be reserved, because crying or showing any emotions was only for females. ¡Sólo las mujeres lloran! Only women cry. If this bears any weight, then I am in deep trouble.

Prior to deciding what I wanted to do when “I grew up,” I wanted to follow my father’s footsteps to pursue a career in medicine. Culturally, I was conditioned to believe that highly-educated males are expected to become future lawyers, doctors, or businessmen.

Having chosen a female-dominated career (counseling), which deals plenty with the emotional psyche, I can’t deny that sometimes I question whether or not I am in the “right field.” I realize it is superficial to think that a career dictates one’s worth, but sadly it does indicate one’s net worth. Still, I am satisfied knowing that despite not pursuing a quintessential “male-driven field,” I am following what’s in my heart and am not relegated to work in a field that is expected just because I am male.

The truth is that a macho man comes in all shapes, forms, and sizes. It is with this satisfaction that I know that I may never bring in a three-digit figure salary, but at least I will have proved to be a loving and compassionate family man, which when the time comes shouldn’t that be all that matters?

Follow Francisco on Twitter @SeguroCepeda

[Photo By Paul Lowry]

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